Day 67. Neglecting My Physical - Because of Experience

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that for me to experience energy within my mind – the energy must come from somewhere. I now see, realize and understand that my mind is actually feeding off of my physical body through taking substance and turning it into energy and thus within this I would neglect and disregard what is real, as my human physical body, all just for an illusionary “experience” within my mind – to keep entertaining and empowering the mind for it to sustain alive and for me to always remain enslaved and controlled by “experience”. When and as I see that I am going into an energetic experience within my mind – I stop and I breathe – I do not accept or allow myself to continue thinking and believing that going into energy as experience will not have any consequence – but instead I see, realize and understand that I am abusing and using my body as substance every time I allow energy within my mind. Thus I commit myself to breathe through experiences as energy and instead bring myself back to the physical and realize that the physical as substance is what is real as life.

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that every time I am having an energetic experience within my mind I am allowing abuse towards my body since the mind takes substance from the physical to turn it into energy – and thus would within this think and believe that the experience as energy is more important than the substance of the physical. I now see, realize and understand that I have never stood equal to and one as my physical as my human body but instead always lived as the illusionary “experience” within and as my mind and thus I have never really understood the consequences that I am putting my body through and thus I would just keep taking and taking substance from the physical just to charge and empower the mind – never even realized that there is always consequences of my acceptances and allowances.

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand the pain that I am inflicting onto my physical as substance, as all life on earth, every time I allow myself to go into experience as energy of my mind – but would instead throughout the years neglect and disregard my physical reality to such an extent that I eventually wouldn’t even see what effects/causes I put my body and this world as a whole through every time I would allow energy as experience within my mind. I now see, realize and understand that I must learn to stand equal to and one with my human physical body as all life and thus face what I have allowed throughout the years – as the pain and suffering I have put my body through – just for my mind to experience “energy” – and what I have allowed this world to become – as the current money-system - and thus within this stand up and ask for forgiveness from my physical as my human physical body, humanity as a whole, the animal kingdom and mother nature – and thus face the consequences of this earth that I have allowed. Within this I see, realize and understand that I am equally responsible as every individual for the suffering on this planet because I have, throughout the years, allowed energy as experience to direct and control me – and would thus neglect and disregard life on earth – all because of a desire to “experience”.

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to take responsibility for how this world has come to be but instead would disregard and neglect what is here, right in front of me, and instead would prioritize “experience” as energy within and of my mind to keep me busy from seeing what is actually going on on this earth as the suffering that is here, right in front of my eyes – and thus not connecting or see that I am as responsible as everybody else for how this world has come to be. I now see, realize and understand that the outflow of following the energy as experience, as all of humanity is allowing, is this world as the current system we live in – thus I see, realize and understand that the only solution to this is to stop the mind as energy as experience and instead see what is here – right in front of our very eyes, where the majority is suffering for the minority to experience “energy” within as money without. I commit myself to, instead of entertaining and keeping myself busy with “experience” within and of my mind – to bring myself back to this reality and to see the consequences that I have allowed – and thus to walk for what is best for all, and not allow any more postponement or disregard through going into my mind, causing friction and thus “experience” – but instead stop, breathe, reassess what is more important – life or “experience”. I commit myself to walk with and as life in each and every breath – here.

• I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that the desire, need and want to experience energy within my mind is more important than my human physical body – and would thus live according to this belief/perception throughout my life – not seeing or realizing the consequences this has on my human physical body – in where the mind is taking substance and turning it into energy and thus slowly but surely killing my physical. But all the time I have been living according to the belief that energy as experience is what is real and would thus be able to neglect and disregard what I am putting my body through – because I allowed myself to get so tangled up in experience that I eventually couldn’t even comprehend what it actually does to my body. I commit myself to stop and breathe myself out of experience and instead see and realize that what is real is my human physical body – and thus within this furthermore commit myself to live life and not live according to and for “experience” – because I now see that “experience” is equivalent to ABUSE of life.

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that following desires/wants/needs will not make me “satisfied” since the mind’s intention is just to get energy, as experience – to sustain itself. I now see, realize and understand that as long as I follow my desires/wants/needs within my mind I will never, ever, become “satisfied” or “pleased” because the only intention from the mind to develop desires/wants/needs is for it to keep attaining energy as substance from and of my physical – thus I will NEVER become satisfied but merely a puppet on a string that follows the mind – and the mind’s intention is not to ever become pleased but instead merely searching for new things/experiences to desire/want/need. Thus when and as I see that I am going for want/need/desire as to for example when I have thoughts such as “I wish I had that body” or “if only I lose a couple of kilos” or “I wish I was more like that” – I stop and I breathe – I do not accept or allow myself to continue to blindly follow the desires/wants/needs but instead I see, realize and understand that this is manipulation of and from my mind – to keep giving my substance away for the mind to turn it into energy as “experience” – and thus I now realize that I will never become satisfied/pleased as long as I follow the mind – because the mind will constantly come up with new desires/wants/needs – just to keep me, giving my power away. And within this I realize that the only way to go about is to delete and remove all desires/wants/needs and instead stand up and live for what is best for all life – to not remain in a state of believing in the desires/wants/needs but instead realize that it is manipulation from my mind for me to keep giving it energy. I commit myself to stop following desires/wants/needs and instead realize that it does not lead anywhere – because the mind will ALWAYS, WITH NO EXCEPTIONS desire/want/need what it cannot have – thus if I am fat I would experience a want/need/desire for being skinny, if I am skinny I will experience a want/need/desire to have a fuller figure, if I have curly hair I will experience a want/need/desire to have straight hair, if I have straight hair I will experience a want/need/desire to have curly hair and so on, and so on. This is entertaining for the mind and does only cause abuse – thus I commit myself to STOP and not allow anymore desires/wants/needs to manipulate me into abusing life.

• I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that experience as energy can only sustain/remain itself for so long – until it runs out and theeere goes the mind again – searching for its next “fix”. Thus within this I now see, realize and understand that experience as energy cannot be real – because nothing that can “run out” or “change” is for real – thus I commit myself to stop following/searching for the “next fix” and furthermore I commit myself to instead follow and do what is best for all life – since I see that that is not something that changes – what is best for all is simply always what is best for all.